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Thread: The Totally Tanked Transfer Tavern (silly season) 2017

  1. #1

    The Totally Tanked Transfer Tavern (silly season) 2017

    In between being linked to 290 players we've signed Atsu. Rumours us and Brighton are fighting for Abraham's on loan.

    The other 288 is just click bait.
    Like tears in the rain

  2. #2
    minty hater roadrunner_0's Avatar
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    im looking forward to this off season, i think city/utd are likely to be suitably silly and god knows what arsenal and chelsea will do
    jones, get her some pants

  3. #3
    So fucking Zen Rush^'s Avatar
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    Major Celtic transfer rumour is we're offering on Patrick Roberts. Spending £5.75mil (plus) to retain a player, not move forward leaves me feeling slightly weird. I guess it's pay that or move backwards. Paddy has recently said he's not heard from City so maybe there's a chance we'll get him. We'll see. I suspect there are a couple of other deals in the offing too (random rumours linked with a bunch of players).
    On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.

  4. #4
    Look like we are in the boss seat for Abraham now. Ruben Semedo links grow. £12.5m.
    Like tears in the rain

  5. #5
    FTJT's Avatar
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    Efe Ambrose is the big signing for Hibs so far; persistent rumours we're getting Anthony Stokes in for a third spell, which would be good

  6. #6
    :ste: Ste's Avatar
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    what the hell is this craziness of Liverpool looking at Van Dijk at Southampton for £60m?!

    Football is completely mad.

    Also, with Hazard breaking his ankle, will that put a move on hold for him this summer?
    Do you believe you’re missing out? Everything good is happening somewhere else.
    But with nobody in your bed, the night’s hard to get through.
    --------------------------------
    Well I've had many different girls inside my bed, but only one or two inside my head
    These days I cuddle up to my guitar instead
    But oh, what I would give, not to stumble but to really fall in love
    And I could substitute my singing for the sound of someone sleeping next to me

  7. #7
    double bolted Lok's Avatar
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    Van Dijk is a quality defender who is available in an era where there aren't many of them. Also liverpool are desperate for good defenders because they are hopeless at the back. Big fee but makes sense.

  8. #8
    Wog Warrior KoeN's Avatar
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    €60m??? seriously???

    absolutely ridiculous imo. very average player.
    Batracer champion 2012 - 2013.

  9. #9
    So fucking Zen Rush^'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ste View Post
    what the hell is this craziness of Liverpool looking at Van Dijk at Southampton for £60m?!
    On the one hand Celtic are due 10% of the sell-on fee so £6 million is nice. On the other hand we got jipped when we "only" sold him for £13 million two years ago as he was just as class then.
    On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.

  10. #10
    Fister Roboto 1-X's Avatar
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    Wolves are linked with Bebe, a turd of a player on Mendes' books. You may vaguely remember the name from the years he spent at Man Utd never playing.

  11. #11
    Wog Warrior KoeN's Avatar
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    i now heard ASRoma is interested to buy Promes from Spartak Moscow, for €37,5m. he has to replace Salah, who might go to Liverpool.


    so: Van Dijk is €60. and a ten times better player (attacker even, so much more rare) costs about half!?

    also: some clubs abroad now have shows interest in Ziyech. they want to pay +€20m already. while he costed €11m last year... i told everyone about this being a ridiculously low amount. @jer, remember?
    Batracer champion 2012 - 2013.

  12. #12
    double bolted Lok's Avatar
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    Seems liverpool have ended their interest!

  13. #13
    If that fee was right then why would the Saints kick off?

    Meanwhile in Glasgow pints remain half empty.
    Like tears in the rain

  14. #14
    double bolted Lok's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by maladoni View Post
    If that fee was right then why would the Saints kick off?

    Meanwhile in Glasgow pints remain half empty.
    Guessing either stains don't want to sell or they have a better offer and have demanded liverpool play ball or get reported.

  15. #15
    So fucking Zen Rush^'s Avatar
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    "We want £70 mil! We want £70 mil!"
    On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.

  16. #16
    :ste: Ste's Avatar
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    So forest have signed Cummings from hibs.
    Any of the Scottish contingent know whether this is a good or bad signing?
    Do you believe you’re missing out? Everything good is happening somewhere else.
    But with nobody in your bed, the night’s hard to get through.
    --------------------------------
    Well I've had many different girls inside my bed, but only one or two inside my head
    These days I cuddle up to my guitar instead
    But oh, what I would give, not to stumble but to really fall in love
    And I could substitute my singing for the sound of someone sleeping next to me

  17. #17
    So fucking Zen Rush^'s Avatar
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    @FTJT would know best. Whenever I've seen him play I've thought he was a bit of a cunt but maybe that's just me. It's probably a decent bit of business for both sides. He scored a decent number of goals and Hibs can use the money to strengthen elsewhere.
    On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.

  18. #18
    FTJT's Avatar
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    He's the good kind of mentalist. He's young, he's great in the box and hardworking for a poacher (but less effective the further he is from goal). Good value signing for forest - absolute bargain if he's half as good as i think he is, and no big outlay if he struggles in a different league.

    It's a big loss for Hibs, but at least we've got clarity about where we're strengthening in the rest of the window

  19. #19
    So fucking Zen Rush^'s Avatar
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    @FTJT if you get Stokes and Commons in you'll end up with half the Celtic squad from 2-3 years ago
    On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.

  20. #20
    So fucking Zen Rush^'s Avatar
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    Liam Boyce joins Burton Albion. If I was a betting man (and I am) I'd put money on him being the league's top scorer. Massive loss for County (who I have some affection for). Supposedly he had a £500k buy-out clause which should likely have been paid by Hibs (I didn't mention this the other day as I didn't want him to leave).
    On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.

  21. #21
    FTJT's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rush^ View Post
    Liam Boyce joins Burton Albion. If I was a betting man (and I am) I'd put money on him being the league's top scorer. Massive loss for County (who I have some affection for). Supposedly he had a £500k buy-out clause which should likely have been paid by Hibs (I didn't mention this the other day as I didn't want him to leave).
    he was one of a couple of players I was hoping we'd sign one of. Fingers currently crossed for Moult

  22. #22
    double bolted Lok's Avatar
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    We're on the verge of signing right back Nathan Thompson who was captain of Swindon last season. Apparently we've been scouting him for ages. Not very exciting although I'm semi expecting some spurs youngsters on loan as Jackett was at their academy last season.

  23. #23
    Quote Originally Posted by maladoni View Post
    In between being linked to 290 players we've signed Atsu. Rumours us and Brighton are fighting for Abraham's on loan.

    The other 288 is just click bait.
    Abraham went to Swansea. Apparently he want to be paid more on top.
    Like tears in the rain

  24. #24
    Wog Warrior KoeN's Avatar
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    we sold Klich to Leeds, and signed Vuckic (out of contract at Newcastle). i'm not unhappy about it.
    Batracer champion 2012 - 2013.

  25. #25
    signing # 2 please.... Florian Lejeune \o/
    Like tears in the rain

  26. #26
    Fister Roboto 1-X's Avatar
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    so, Ruben Neves is at Wolves for a record fee around £15.8m, ambitious or ridiculous?

  27. #27
    Wow, impressive. Hope he does well for you, may take a little time to adapt to the championship though.
    Like tears in the rain

  28. #28
    spurs have to be happy to get 50m for walker

  29. #29
    double bolted Lok's Avatar
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    They must simply think they can afford to lose him because tripper is good enough and it lets them bulk up their squad. If it wasn't for tripper I can't think why you would sell walker unless you needed the money.

  30. #30
    double bolted Lok's Avatar
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    We've signed young keeper luke mcgee from spurs on a permanent deal. Was apparently voted Peterborough's players' player of the year last season which on paper makes him look like a good signing.

    No relation to Debbie as far as I know.

  31. #31
    They just need to avoid signing another lamela. RBs arent the hardest to find.

  32. #32
    double bolted Lok's Avatar
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    And now Brett Pitman from Ipswich. Hopefully he can mine a rich vein of form.

  33. #33
    Lets face it, he seems like a rock solid signing. Three for the price of one folks.
    Like tears in the rain

  34. #34
    :ste: Ste's Avatar
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    rumours are the Assombalonga is going to Middlesborough... That will be 4 straight seasons that we've sold our best player...
    Do you believe you’re missing out? Everything good is happening somewhere else.
    But with nobody in your bed, the night’s hard to get through.
    --------------------------------
    Well I've had many different girls inside my bed, but only one or two inside my head
    These days I cuddle up to my guitar instead
    But oh, what I would give, not to stumble but to really fall in love
    And I could substitute my singing for the sound of someone sleeping next to me

  35. #35
    double bolted Lok's Avatar
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    From what I've read it's boro fans who might be sombre longer given that the fee is 14m.....

  36. #36
    Bumped. 14m, bonkers.

    Jacob Murphy looks like a goer 10m +2m ad ons, and Javier Manquillo 4.5m from Atletico.
    Like tears in the rain

  37. #37
    double bolted Lok's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by maladoni View Post
    Bumped. 14m, bonkers.

    Jacob Murphy looks like a goer 10m +2m ad ons, and Javier Manquillo 4.5m from Atletico.
    Wasn't manquillo shit for the Mackems?

  38. #38
    Ronaldo would look terrible playing for that shower of shite.

    Rafa's Spanish connections must see something and at 4.5m Big Mike will have a hard on.
    Like tears in the rain

  39. #39
    double bolted Lok's Avatar
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    Any attacking quality in the pipeline?

  40. #40
    I assume you mean strikers? Diego Rolan, Bordeaux is the only reoccurring name. Not great. Slimani has cropped up today can't see us paying that much though. You know when your reading about how much Daryl Murphy is looking forward to the Premiership that things up top look grim. Lot of pressure on Gayle's hamstrings already.
    Like tears in the rain

  41. #41
    :ste: Ste's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by maladoni View Post
    Bumped. 14m, bonkers.

    Jacob Murphy looks like a goer 10m +2m ad ons, and Javier Manquillo 4.5m from Atletico.
    32 goals last season in a shit side, 29 3 years ago. Goals get you out of this division and born have parachute payments... Definitely skews things...
    Do you believe you’re missing out? Everything good is happening somewhere else.
    But with nobody in your bed, the night’s hard to get through.
    --------------------------------
    Well I've had many different girls inside my bed, but only one or two inside my head
    These days I cuddle up to my guitar instead
    But oh, what I would give, not to stumble but to really fall in love
    And I could substitute my singing for the sound of someone sleeping next to me

  42. #42
    double bolted Lok's Avatar
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    Zouma partnering Shawcross at Stoke. Solid.

  43. #43
    double bolted Lok's Avatar
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    Also great to see villa providing some entertainment with elmohamady, whelan and samba.

    Villa are going to be unbelievable at corners.

  44. #44
    Wog Warrior KoeN's Avatar
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    last year the transfer record was broken: 105m euros for a 'very good midfielder'.

    now the new record: 180m euros. and it is not even Messi we are talking about. no, it's Mbappé.




    sick.
    Batracer champion 2012 - 2013.

  45. #45
    MIkel Merino incoming £6.2m
    Like tears in the rain

  46. #46
    :ste: Ste's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KoeN View Post
    last year the transfer record was broken: 105m euros for a 'very good midfielder'.

    now the new record: 180m euros. and it is not even Messi we are talking about. no, it's Mbappé.


    sick.
    At some point this all has to come crashing down doesn't it? 180m euros... bloody hell...
    Do you believe you’re missing out? Everything good is happening somewhere else.
    But with nobody in your bed, the night’s hard to get through.
    --------------------------------
    Well I've had many different girls inside my bed, but only one or two inside my head
    These days I cuddle up to my guitar instead
    But oh, what I would give, not to stumble but to really fall in love
    And I could substitute my singing for the sound of someone sleeping next to me

  47. #47
    :ste: Ste's Avatar
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    So Forest have now signed Darikwa from Burnley, Murphy from Newcastle (£2m for a 34 year old?!), McKay from Rangers and Cummins from Hibs.
    Apparently also signed Joe Coveney and Liam Bossin whoever they are.
    Do you believe you’re missing out? Everything good is happening somewhere else.
    But with nobody in your bed, the night’s hard to get through.
    --------------------------------
    Well I've had many different girls inside my bed, but only one or two inside my head
    These days I cuddle up to my guitar instead
    But oh, what I would give, not to stumble but to really fall in love
    And I could substitute my singing for the sound of someone sleeping next to me

  48. #48
    So fucking Zen Rush^'s Avatar
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    Enjoy Barry "6 million pound man" McKay.
    On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.

  49. #49
    double bolted Lok's Avatar
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    Darikwa was good when I last saw him but that was in League 2 4 seasons ago (think he was playing for Chesterfield)

  50. #50
    :ste: Ste's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rush^ View Post
    Enjoy Barry "6 million pound man" McKay.
    Think we bought him for £700k or something, which seems quite a bargain...
    Do you believe you’re missing out? Everything good is happening somewhere else.
    But with nobody in your bed, the night’s hard to get through.
    --------------------------------
    Well I've had many different girls inside my bed, but only one or two inside my head
    These days I cuddle up to my guitar instead
    But oh, what I would give, not to stumble but to really fall in love
    And I could substitute my singing for the sound of someone sleeping next to me

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